The Ontograph: Your personal Bluth chicken dance.

The Bluth Family from Arrested Development doing their Chicken Imitations is an analogy for our misguided attempts at life.
The Bluth Family from Arrested Development doing their chicken imitations is an analogy for our misguided attempts at life.

About once a week, I think of a new analogy or explanation of the ontograph. In a Facebook conversation today, I came up with this one:

We live in the objective world, but experience occurs in our minds, in a sort of virtual reality version of the objective world constructed of knowledge and misconceptions we’ve gathered up to the moment. Unfortunately, each person’s best guess of the objective world is usually an absolute wreck. When we make “objective” statements, or judgment calls based on our terrible mental maps, they’re inextricably modeled on our flawed internal geometry.

If you’ve never seen a chicken, you’re going to base your impression on whatever you’ve been able to glean from the world. The Bluths in the show Arrested Development are too elite to have ever encountered a chicken, and taunt each other with preposterous impressions based on the vaguest ideas they hold from passing references plus their own fill-in-the-blank ontographic puzzle solving.

Everything we do is some part “decent guess” and some part “terrible guess” at the true nature of the universe. If we’ve discovered a very reliable principle to base our actions on, so much the better. Here are some I’ve encountered, stated to my best ability:

  • 1 + 1 = 2
  • Every choice has an opportunity cost.
  • Human agency has infinite value.

I’d love to hear what principles you’ve been able to discover. Go ahead and comment below. Don’t worry if it’s not a very accurate chicken dance.

Published
Categorized as Analogies